sleep.......................

Sleep...When it comes..very hard to escape..
Since I have come here it has become a routine for me to sleep whenever the trainers are around....
Since they call us professionals they expect us to behave like professionals.........But then also something or the other thing happens...
Na..Na It's not like that I don't behave like a professional, I give my 100% to it..But unfortunately I can't escape my sleep...whenever a trainer is blathering something.....it puts me automatically into sleep........
It's like it is rooted in my nerves....whenever trainer comes ....My all neurons of body send a single signal to brain......... “ WOW........NOW IT IS THE TIME FOR SLEEP..”
I just go to sleep...
I always try to control my sleep.........I promise my self not to sleep when the trainers are around..I also ask my next neighbors to pinch me, tweak my hands and nip on to my shoulders so that I can stay awake for some time and get something.....
But alas! Nothing works for me...............every time I sleep I get caught …..Now people must be thinking that I don't sleep in night....but it is nothing to do with that.....Even though I sleep for 6-7 hours..i still do keep yawning....What does that indicate......?.


.Is there a problem with me...
Or is there some problem with my trainers who are very reputed and recognized people....Or is it a problem with the profession....BANKING...
Is banking boring?........
I didn't know previously but when I read the novel “ Everyone worth knowing” the writer was so influencing that I convinced myself that I get sleep because banking is boring........There is no fault in me...I am absolutely fine..The fault lies in the profession that I have chosen....But it is something about which I cant do anything...I know if I have to survive I have to like banking...But how............If I try to find out any mistake in cheque, dd, BO or an MC.....All the time I will be increasing my liabilities......I know, I seriously have to do something......
I don't hate banking I really like it if it done for few hours........but for 12 hours …............. it really sucks!..
whenever my mind hear the word “banking” It automatically triggers a signal to go to sleep...and that is what happening now.............I think if I will continuously talk about the term banking.......I will go for …..sleep.... ...I should stop using the term banking before I …z....z......z......nrrr.....nrrr..............nrrr..............nrrr...

Just like that..........................

He called me last night……..We talked for hours and the he said
He: Chalo now you go to sleep…..
Me: But I am not feeling sleepy.
He: So what! You should go to bed now it is very late!
Me: But I want to talk to you…
He: But I have to watch a serial now…..so u sleep and I will watch…
Me: No….No …You can watch it tomorrow…
He: No….today only…
I didn’t allow him to watch that serial...When next day I called him…He talked to me for few minutes and then he started screaming…
Me: what happened?
He: I got headache…I have to make tea for me…
Me:Ya, do it. You need to take rest! I will call you later …
He: Bye
After some time when I again called just to know how is he feeling…..He was very happy so I asked him..
Me: sometime back you were almost screaming and now you are happy?
He: yes…because I have finished my serial watching…….Now say what were you talking…..
Me: Means just to watch a serial you lied to me…?
He: (very politely)…..Yes…..Just like that....
Me: Just like that means what?
He: Because you didn’t allow me to watch the serial last night ….and today morning when I was watching it u again called me. So I have to do.....
Me:…..What…..Just to watch a serial u have to make that sound……both of us starting laughing…………………………………………You are very SWEET sweetz…………….

The forgetful me

Very lately I have observed that I forget things very easily. You introduced me your name and after 10 minutes I wont be able to recall. And birthday dates! ...It is like I always wish the person after his birthday is over. Well so what..Every time I wish my friends and family after their birthdays are over...and About names...My rommie, She is the most disgruntled girl on this whole cosmos seeing that for a successive period of 10 days I called her with a distinct name. It put me in lot of discomposure and embarrassment at certain goings-on. As I used to forget certain assignment or work given to me. But I never tried to get weighty about it.

One day in a windy morning, when I woke up I had nothing to do. So I started searching some books in my book shelf. I picked up one book and started reading but couldn't exactly guess the meaning of few words. I searched for my dictionary and I coudnt find it. Hence I went to my next door neighbor and asked....
ME: Do you have my dictionary?
She: She was on the phone.....(In a very ferocious mood, she was talking to her BF, so she ignored me!)
ME: Continuously knocking on the door instead of realizing that I can ask it later also...
She: (Got irritated …..and yelled at me in a very abrupt and barbaric manner.) “ How many times you will come to ask me for this, This is the 8th time you are coming. It is too much. You should take care of your belongings. When I told in last seven times that I have not taken your dictionary ....why do you come again and again...”...
ME: I apologizes you for coming to you 8th time . I am so sorry. I just forgot.
She: Garishly....How many times do you forget? Have you got brain?
I came back from that place as I got agonized because of my own misdemeanor . Nonetheless I started cussing her..

Isn't she aware of how to talk to a colleague?
How ill-behaved she is? How dare she is to yell at me?
Let her come next time ..I will take avenge of this guff.... that she did to me..
What she thinks of her self?
How can she forget things which I did for her?
Kitni gandi hai vo...How impertinent and discourteous she is?
These south Indians are like that only....They are boorish, mean, loutish,
I will never help her....in future..
I will see her I know she will come to me when she will need this...that thing from me...
moti bhains.....chunky buffalo...
cocky, roli-poli buffalo.......moti kaddu kahi ki,...Tu dekh Me batati hoon tuje.....
I ll never talk to her in future, even if she will talk to me I will sidestep her and will yammer at her like” “why are you disquieting me?” “I am busy.” “I cant speak to you”..With these thoughts I went to bathroom.....Got ready..
went outside with a badgering frame of mind...Thinking in mind ( Why did I go to this stupid girl.. how can I forget things)
I met few of my friends and went with them to temple..We sang songs..We played games...After going there I forgot everything that happened in morning.
At the later part of the day when I returned back happily..to my place. I wanted to share my Prasad with someone. And the first person whom I gave this prasad was my next door neighbor...
I told her about my trip ….After which we went for tea together, We dined together........
Ultimately when I went on to sleep..I thought What did I get by cursing her??

When I knew that I will forget everything whatever she will say!

The forgetful me

Very lately I have observed that I forget things very easily. You introduced me your name and after 10 minutes I wont be able to recall. And birthday dates! ...It is like I always wish the person after his birthday is over. Well so what..Every time I wish my friends and family after their birthdays are over...and About names...My rommie, She is the most disgruntled girl on this whole cosmos seeing that for a successive period of 10 days I called her with a distinct name. It put me in lot of discomposure and embarrassment at certain goings-on. As I used to forget certain assignment or work given to me. But I never tried to get weighty about it.

One day in a windy morning, when I woke up I had nothing to do. So I started searching some books in my book shelf. I picked up one book and started reading but couldn't exactly guess the meaning of few words. I searched for my dictionary and I coudnt find it. Hence I went to my next door neighbor and asked....
ME: Do you have my dictionary?
She: She was on the phone.....(In a very ferocious mood, she was talking to her BF, so she ignored me!)
ME: Continuously knocking on the door instead of realizing that I can ask it later also...
She: (Got irritated …..and yelled at me in a very abrupt and barbaric manner.) “ How many times you will come to ask me for this, This is the 8th time you are coming. It is too much. You should take care of your belongings. When I told in last seven times that I have not taken your dictionary ....why do you come again and again...”...
ME: I apologizes you for coming to you 8th time . I am so sorry. I just forgot.
She: Garishly....How many times do you forget? Have you got brain?
I came back from that place as I got agonized because of my own misdemeanor . Nonetheless I started cussing her..

Isn't she aware of how to talk to a colleague?
How ill-behaved she is? How dare she is to yell at me?
Let her come next time ..I will take avenge of this guff.... that she did to me..
What she thinks of her self?
How can she forget things which I did for her?
Kitni gandi hai vo...How impertinent and discourteous she is?
These south Indians are like that only....They are boorish, mean, loutish,
I will never help her....in future..
I will see her I know she will come to me when she will need this...that thing from me...
moti bhains.....chunky buffalo...
cocky, roli-poli buffalo.......moti kaddu kahi ki,...Tu dekh Me batati hoon tuje.....
I ll never talk to her in future, even if she will talk to me I will sidestep her and will yammer at her like” “why are you disquieting me?” “I am busy.” “I cant speak to you”..With these thoughts I went to bathroom.....Got ready..
went outside with a badgering frame of mind...Thinking in mind ( Why did I go to this stupid girl.. how can I forget things)
I met few of my friends and went with them to temple..We sang songs..We played games...After going there I forgot everything that happened in morning.
At the later part of the day when I returned back happily..to my place. I wanted to share my Prasad with someone. And the first person whom I gave this prasad was my next door neighbor...
I told her about my trip ….After which we went for tea together, We dined together........
Ultimately when I went on to sleep..I thought What did I get by cursing her??

When I knew that I will forget everything whatever she will say!

why people change?

Why people change? I have been thinking over it from last few days since I have observed some change in the behavior of one of my near one. Is it just natural for a person to change without any reason or is something going inside his/her mind? We always think that we know much about people whom we are close to? But the question has started distressing me …do I really know? If that would have been true I would have never felt this change? Which is upsetting me daily with thousands of depressing things peeping into my head…? So what should I do now?
Shall I speak up about this change to him/her or should I remain quiet and observe his/her behavior for some more time….can anyone predict human nature? I don’t know whether people change at all. But I know the way a person behaves is sometimes so unexpected that we feel that they have changed….and same is the case with me.
Last few days and nights I have been thinking over this change?
Why has this change occurred?
When I don’t see any reason to change at all…
Am I so cold-blooded, insensitive and heartless that I couldn’t understand his/her feelings…or is the other one who has stopped thinking about me…?
How should I deal with this change which is making me to sob day and nights…?
Since the day I have felt this change I am not happy. I always try to cheer up myself that if something is mine, that will always be mine…and if not…then think that it was never mine…
But my heart is such that it doesn’t get soothed by these things. It always prompt me to find out the cause…which again questions me back…if my love for him/her did not change, how could he/she do so?
If my feelings are same as they were years ago……how he/she is not able to feel them now…
Why I feel saddened with every answer that I hear from him/her for my questions....
Have they really changed themselves or is it me who has increased her expectations from him/her….
Which one is true…I don’t know…
I know that I need him/her very much in my life to love, care, support and walk the every step of life with me…But I am confused as how should I speak this to him/her. I fear what if I get disappointing answer…I fear the breaking of my heart….But then again same thought occurs to my mind. If he/she wants to break my heart…He/she will definitely do that one day…so I should go and speak to him/her about this change…But I fear to face rejection. I know I can’t cope with the disappointing answer……I have almost zero ego strength. Hence I have decided to let happen things as they are
Happening with the same thought in mind …
If something’s yours and you let it go,
if it comes back to you, then it was yours all along.

I have seen life crying.......

I have seen life weeping…..
Some inherit two times meals from their descendants,
Some shed tears for a bite
Even if they get it, they panic for tomorrow
They are scared to think…
I have seen life dying because of hunger!

Over a small quarrel, vow not to speak for generations
What is the secret in this?
To live life without our near ones,
Which secret of life is this?
I have seen life fighting with the relationships….


Every time I see any waifs and strays,
My heart asks me sympathetically,
Who said that other’s life is not filled with the storms of grief?
I have seen stories walking on the roads and streets…….

Still living in dimness...........................

Indian government has banned employment of children below 14 years a long back ago in 2006. The penalty for flouting the law is a jail term ranging from three month to 2 years with or without fine that could range from 10,000 to 20,000. But that doesn’t seem to have left any impact on our country or its people even after 3 years of its implementation. So where did we go wrong? These days too we can notice lot of kids working in dhaba’s, small shops, or on the railway stations. Children of age 8-10 can be frequently seen in trains cleaning the birth and near by area. It looks like if the law was just made on papers, and was never a serious concern of either the government or the law makes who essentially came with this. We can still give explanation for some uneducated people, (like people from small shops or dhaba’s employing these kids for the reason that the government failed to create awareness about its new law that prevent kids below 14 from working). But what about our so called learned people…..I had my interview in ITM business school; I went to Mumbai via train. Throughout my journey I saw several kids below 14 selling tea, fruits etc…..but I was surprised to see a toddler within the campus of business school. They say they are grooming leaders for tomorrow, I don’t know what type of leaders they are preparing by employing a kid who is still in his child hood and almost certainly may not know what does leaders of tomorrow means. A business school has people who are very knowledgeable, scholarly and socially responsible. Then how can they close their eyes to this? They simply talk of teaching corporate social responsibility to young managers…Is this the sort of corporate responsibility they are teaching? A business school charges a single student somewhere between 8 to 12 lakh every year. By that figure it must be earning a good amount in a year bearing in mind its student intake capacity to its various courses. Can’t they employ any young man above 14 who is on the lookout for work? (Generally kids are paid less) They earn so much of money that they can finance that child education….but that is just my imagination because I know it will never happen. But still I have a ray of hope from them that one day they will wake up to this and will not at least take a kid’s childhood from him. It doesn’t end with that college. Still in many offices you can see kids serving tea…etc…..
We are educated; we understand what a childhood means. We can feel it…we have gone through it. We are socially responsible, financially independent...… Moreover we are well informed about this……and we know that we are capable of bringing this change.
Still no one is doing anything….These issues most of the times go unreported by media…..They will report everything including what Indian cricketers did eat? They will report whether kareena put the lipstick or not? They will report sachin is watching movie with his family…But they hardly highlight issues for which the MEDIA term came into existence. If we so called “learned people” of this society disregard such concerns then how can we blame people who are not only living their own life in the darkness but also making thousands of kids to undergo the same….We just cannot expect them to be aware of these things when we have closed our eyes ………..even after seeing it, feeling it…..and lastly knowing about it that It pains a lot if we just imagine our own son or daughter or brother/sister in the same place……

Slow poisoning of our nation

We often take the nutritional goodness of vegetables and fruits for granted. However, the various chemicals and pesticide residues that these edible products are laced with pose a serious danger to our health. Here's a video that highlights the dangers of such practices
watch this video---here
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6926416900837431282&hl=en